The Dark Side of Blogging and Being Myself
While you read this I will be studiously listening to one of the many amazing talks at the ProBlogger conference and rubbing shoulders with a myriad of other cool bloggers.
As I write this though, it’s Wednesday afternoon and my trip to ProBlogger has made me think back to the North Coast Creative Business Women’s High Tea I attended a couple of months ago.
At this high tea, I was lucky enough to meet Chantelle of Fat Mum Slim, Renee from Mummy Wife Me, Kathy from Yin Yang Mother and Emily from Have A Laugh On Me. When I was having a chat with Emily (a seriously cool chick) she made a comment that’s really got me thinking. So what did Emily say? She mentioned that I wasn’t what she expected, she thought that I was lots more outgoing in real life than I am on my blog, and I actually tend to agree with her.
Let me explain. It’s not that I’m trying to be a different person on the blog, because I’m not. It’s not that I’m not being honest, because I am…all the time. I’m still being me, but a more reserved me.
My problem is that I worry too much, it’s the ‘worry wart’ and anxious Eva in me. I fear what will happen if I share a little bit of my crazy side, if I share more of an opinion or if I approach things with a bit more of a light hearted perspective. What will people think, what if people don’t like the other side of Eva?
I’ve seen some bloggers being 100% themselves and letting it all out only to cop loads of criticism and nasty comments. I worry that this will happen to me and I’m not built for that kind of stuff.
For example, my post on Butter vs. Margarine. Who would have thought people would have been so passionate about their butter! I really couldn’t give two hoots what other peoples decisions in life are, if it’s good for them, fair enough. And because I feel this way, I just didn’t expect the backlash that came with a very innocent post. I never posted it to be controversial, I hate confrontation, I did it to be informative. Lets just say, I worried about the post and the Facebook comments all day.
So I think to myself, is it worth it? Is it worth totally putting every bit of me out there at the risk of having the odd few people not like what I say? Do I put the entire Eva out there, crazy and with opinions to make my blog more interesting and less serious? Is that what readers want? Is that my path to getting more readers?
I admire other bloggers who just come out with it, they share their opinions and thoughts uncensored and their posts make me laugh, I love their insights and how they share in their craziness. When I read them, I think to myself ‘they really sound a lot like me, I wish I had the guts to just write it like that’.
It’s a matter of self preservation and I’m in two minds. Perhaps I might gain some more insight at the blogging conference.
And so this is my current blogging conundrum.