I don’t know why this comes and goes each week, actually, this week there’s probably a lot of reasons.
This is not a post where I’m going to come up with ways to get me out of this ‘funk’, I’ve written plenty of those. This is simply reality, we all have bad days no matter what we try and do.
I know there may be some that don’t like this post, sure, it’s not what you came to my blog for, but hey, this hormone driven pregnant woman behind the blog is real and needs to vent!
So, why am I in this ‘funk’?
Well, where do I start…
- I’m concerned that unwanted (and unneeded) stress is coming back in my work when I promised myself I wouldn’t let it get that way, especially considering my pregnancy.
- I’ve lost motivation for my blog again because I’m stressed and busy.
- I’m annoyed at myself for being stressed and busy because it’s all self-inflicted.
- I find myself longing to spend more time with Elliott and I wish I could just have him at home with me every day. I find myself drifting off a lot thinking about him, his skin, his hair, his smile, his giggle and us just sitting and playing cars.
- I keep losing confidence in my blog. I’ve put love, sweat and tears into it since July 2012 and every now and then I question myself, I wonder if it’s actually any good and admire those who have been able to make their blogs absolutely buzz.
- Facebook is getting me down. Again, no matter how much effort I put into this damn social media platform, so few people see my posts. I’ve tried using suggestions from many people but they don’t work. Now I’m wondering if it’s just the fact that people aren’t that keen on what I’m sharing and maybe I’m missing the mark?
- I feel lonely. Working from home every day does this to me and when I see friends on the dreaded social media doing stuff I get the whole stupid FOMO thing going on.
- I worry I’m not a good friend or the type of person people want to hang out with or get to know. I keep wondering to myself ‘am I too boring, too loud, annoying, talk too much, too busy?’ I must confess, I’m crap at making friends. I’m happy chatting with people, but when it comes to friendships and really clicking with people, it makes me nervous as all hell and I often avoid it.
This is definitely not a sympathy seeking post, this is just me letting it all go and sharing it to show that although most of the time I’m definitely all about positivity and being inspired, today I’m just not. We can’t be that way all the time, can we? We’re human. Right now though, I’m going to blame the pregnancy hormones.
On a positive note, I have my 20-week scan tomorrow! What will it be a BOY or a GIRL??