Me Time…Without The Guilt

me time
Last weekend a wonderful opportunity reared its head and allowed me to getaway with a friend for an overnight stay in a nice hotel and not once did I feel guilty about it.

Me time, time out, relaxation, mummy time…whatever you like to call it, this time I have on my own to do what makes me happy is my sanity saver.

But I hear people saying “but isn’t being a Mum to your child what makes you happy?”  My response is yes and no. Of course I’m happy when I get to be with my son, when I get to play, when I get to cuddle. But I’m also happy when I get a chance to do the things that make me who I am and I am most definitely more than just a mother. I am a friend, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a career woman and most definitely a woman with many aspirations and big dreams that I simply cannot neglect.

If I am to be all the things that make me who I am, I need to take time for each of them.  I don’t see it as selfish, it is looking after me so I can 100% focus on my family and be happy doing it. It’s about the quality of the time I’m with my family rather than the quantity of the time. The time I spend with my family I want to be fully present, without stress, worry or disappointment that I haven’t reached personal goals, I don’t want these things to have a negative effect on my family.  If taking time out for myself to I read my favourite magazine for 20 minutes, go for a pedi-cure or go away with a friend overnight is what is going to help me get that quality time, so be it.

I’ve heard many other mums say they simply don’t get the chance for ‘me time’. I say you’ve just got to make the time, plan ahead and book it into your calendar. If you want a night away with your friends or even a night out to dinner, stop now and book it in your diary. If you’re keen to have a pedicure, make a phone call for an appointment. If you’re keen to have a night away with your husband/partner, contact your parents/sister/friends and arrange a baby sitter. All it takes is a bit of pre-planning and listening to the voice in your head saying ‘come on, let’s do it!’ If going away is too difficult for whatever reason, still make time to do what you love. Schedule it in. Arrange it with your partner. Make sure you do it.

And then once you get used to booking in time for yourself, you’ll find it becomes a bit of habit, a habit that will starts to pay off for you and those around you and you’ll find that guilt starts to ease because you see what great benefits it has. You’ll have more of you to give.

 

Eva Lewis (The Multitasking Woman)

Eva is the Editor and Owner of The Multitasking Woman - a lifestyle and parenting blog.She always has her fingers in many different pies but wouldn't have it any other way. Eva is a Mum to her 4-year-old son, 2 month old daughter, two chickens, one dog and a fish called Bob and a wife to Mr G. They all live happily in their little cottage on the outskirts of Brisbane.

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20 Comments

  1. June 16, 2015 / 8:56 am

    Totally agree Eva! I had 24 hrs away from the family this weekend and it was great! But I was very happy to get home too 🙂

    • Eva @ The Multitasking Mummy
      June 16, 2015 / 3:12 pm

      And that’s exactly what happens doesn’t it, you get there, you have a good time and then you bloody miss them! Ha

  2. June 16, 2015 / 9:04 am

    When I first became a mum, I used to watch a lot of Oprah. I heard a quote on a show once that said “for a child to be happy, the mother needs to be happy first” It has been my mantra for motherhood for 17 years, and will continue through the rest of their lives.

  3. June 16, 2015 / 12:10 pm

    I actually got some forced me time. Hubby basically pushed me out the door and I was kid free for 24 hours. It was strange but amazing and I can’t wait to do it again!

  4. June 16, 2015 / 3:18 pm

    I think ‘me’ time is important for everyone. It’s a bit like exercise, you need to make it a habit and see it as an important commitment.

  5. June 16, 2015 / 3:19 pm

    Good on you! Having some ‘me’ time is definitely a must if you can get it. Even the most awesome job in the world starts to grate when you do it 24/7. Thanks for linking with #TeamIBOT.

  6. June 16, 2015 / 4:03 pm

    I think “me time” is so important for everyone.
    When my son was young I made the most of nap times, when he went down at 12noon it was my 1 and half hours to do what makes me happy (not housework), without it I would have lost my sanity.

  7. June 16, 2015 / 9:12 pm

    Absolutely! Big chunks of me-time is the only thing that keeps me sane! I love my boys, but I also love time to myself. Being an introvert, even more so,

  8. June 16, 2015 / 9:51 pm

    Writing is my ‘me time.’ I don’t usually feel the need to leave the house because my mind has taken me far, far away. But then there are weeks, when getting out is necessary for everyone! 🙂
    Glad you had a lovely weekend. xx

  9. June 17, 2015 / 7:43 pm

    Eva – in yoga we talk about resetting your nervous system, which you can do in a class or meditation. Time way is a reboot that we all need. Glad you enjoyed it.

  10. June 18, 2015 / 7:54 am

    Everyone needs some R & R every so often. When you’ve got kids, you need to be more focussed about getting it. Glad yiu had a lovely time

  11. June 18, 2015 / 9:44 am

    I would love some me time carved into my day. My kids are older, 9 and 16, however when I school was in session, I worked the exact same hours. I would ride in the car with my 9 year old to school every morning, go in and work (I was a para or teachers aide), leave every afternoon with my 9 year old, come home and do the housework and dinner. The only me time felt like it came when I took a shower at night. Even when I went to bed, my 9 year old is spoiled rotten (love her dearly though!), would lay down in my bed until she went to sleep, and then I would go to sleep and my husband would take her to bed when he came. No, hubby and I have no time together anymore either. Geez….he and I need a date, and I need some me time!! Wow. Now that school is out and I am working full time from home, I am hoping that I will find some time for myself! Anyways, sorry to go on about my story. 🙂 I am glad you enjoyed your me time, there is NO reason at all to feel guilty about it!

  12. June 25, 2015 / 5:54 pm

    Having some ‘me’ time is so important. I admit I don’t give myself much of it. I totally give myself the guilts but would occasionally do a little something away from the family. Although now with a newborn in the house again, it might be a while. Thinking I may need to squeeze in a quick massage next week before hubby returns to work though. Maybe a haircut too 😉 I will work on making it more regular too.