I remember instantaneously stressing about the state of my house. ‘What will they think about the dirty dishes strewn across the sink? Will they look at the floor and see that it hasn’t been vacuumed?’
Let’s just say that not so long ago this topped my list as my number one pet hate. It was like I was trying to put on some sort of facade, like I was trying to appear as though I had it all together, trying to be perfect, trying to be SUPERWOMAN.
Fast forward to this week and I’m happy to say that now, well, I really don’t give a shit.
On Monday, my next door neighbour popped over to let me know she’d just seen a snake in her backyard and wanted to alert me because of our chooks. Although I’ve only just started to get to know my neighbour, I don’t really know her at all. We were chatting away on the front verandah until I happily and without hesitation, invited her into our house. Elliott’s toys were everywhere, there were numerous baskets overflowing with washing, a dining table covered in crap and a bench full of dirty dishes. For the first time in ages, I didn’t care. After she had left, I gave myself a pat on the back, it was so damn refreshing.
When I come to think of it, it’s quite likely that it made my neighbour feel somewhat normal too. I suspect that with a little toddler who is only just starting to walk, she too is unlikely to have a spotless house (I’ve haven’t been over there yet but a playdate with the kids is on the horizon).
I think that as the almost 35 months have floated by of me being a mum, I’ve slowly been able to ‘embrace the mess‘, to accept that mess is normal, to realise that people don’t judge and even if they do say something to themselves in thought, that’s what it is, a personal thought and something that doesn’t have to affect me.
Mess is inevitable, it’s there sometimes and not all the time. When it is there, I’ve finally learned to accept it and to not worry about what others think of it.
It’s so worth not having to deal with the stress. And who knows, if I had been the old me and refused to invite my neighbour in, well, we may not have connected, had the conversation we did or arranged coffee and a play date!
I also wouldn’t mind if Ryan turned up and offered to clean my house though….