To Baby Shower or Not to Baby Shower… #MummyMondays

baby shower

I read an article recently written by a Mum who believed that a baby shower was like celebrating a win before the race is over. She went on to say that women who had babyshower’s were incredibly optimistic, she felt that it seems inappropriate to celebrate before the baby has arrived.

I’d have to disagree on this one.

I couldn’t wait for my babyshower. And it wasn’t about the gifts, it was about celebrating the life that was inside of me, it was celebrating the 33  or so weeks I’d endured, it was celebrating life itself which is always laden with risks. If I relate my experience to what this mum is saying, yes I was taking a risk in having my baby shower but what would life be like if we always held off celebrating because it was too much of a risk? Of course I understand a mother not wanting a baby shower if her pregnancy was in fact a high risk, but in general I just don’t think there should be so much scepticism.

baby shower
I’ll never forget my babyshower. Although cliche, the games were loads of fun. I shed many tears while reading the amazing messages from my friends and family while sitting in the rocking chair Mr. G eventually repainted for me. The gift packs that family and friends put together for me with baby lotions, powders, shampoos and creams lasted almost 3 years and I’m grateful for these gifts because they saved us a lot of money. When the time has come to give gifts to my friends or family at their baby shower, I go all out and return the favour. I’d have to say that baby shower gifts are my favourite gifts to put together!

 

baby shower game

One of the many baby shower games. This one was ‘guess the mystery mush’.

After my baby shower I loved the experience of setting up my baby’s room with all the gifts we received, they were gifts given with love. Still today Elliott has his favourite little blankie named Ellie the Elephant and I can tell you exactly who that gift was from.

babyshower
What I will say though is that I’m a firm believer in having only one baby shower. By the time your second child comes around, you should well and truly be set up with baby bits and pieces. If it’s all about the celebration then perhaps have a high-tea or low key celebration with no expectation of gifts.

Back to the comment by the mum in the article, there are always so many risks in life and when you don’t take risks you often have regrets. My baby shower was going to be the first and last I’d ever have and I didn’t want to regret not having one and not being able to share a special afternoon with family and friends.

I also think that focusing on optimism and positivity during pregnancy is so important, it would be a shame to be pessimistic and miss out on all the good stuff. And, mind you, there was no way I was in any mood (or had any energy) to celebrate after Elliott’s arrival, I struggled to get through Christmas celebrations after getting home from hospital on the 23rd of December let alone having a celebration!

Oh gosh, I’m getting all sentimental now. I need to go and look back at the photos! I’ve shared a few…ooh I miss that tummy!

 

Did you have a baby shower?

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Eva Lewis (The Multitasking Woman)

Eva is the Editor and Owner of The Multitasking Woman - a lifestyle and parenting blog.She always has her fingers in many different pies but wouldn't have it any other way. Eva is a Mum to her 4-year-old son, 2 month old daughter, two chickens, one dog and a fish called Bob and a wife to Mr G. They all live happily in their little cottage on the outskirts of Brisbane.

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20 Comments

  1. May 25, 2015 / 6:14 am

    I have to admit, I’m not a fan of the baby shower – not due to risks involved, more just what am I actually meant to be celebrating? That the person is pregnant? Happy to shower the baby with gifts once the baby is there, but I find the shower more like having a party for someone who isn’t there, and sometimes for someone who’s name and gender I don’t know.

  2. May 25, 2015 / 6:28 am

    Oh Eva, I can see why you’re feeling sentimental. Those photos are so lovely. It sounds like you marked the occasion surrounded by wonderful family and friends – perfect! P.S. I love your dress – so pretty.

  3. May 25, 2015 / 7:13 am

    I have never had a baby shower or attended one! I never thought to have one and I don’t recall ever even hearing about one. I am glad you enjoyed yours though. I have never been one of those people to put myself in the limelight though and I would shy away from the experience. I should work on that!

  4. May 25, 2015 / 7:38 am

    I did indeed have a baby shower as my best friend wouldn’t have accepted no even if I didn’t want one lol. But it was a wonderful occasion celebrating with friends & family. I’m about to pop again & was going to have a small no gift get together this time too but my sister recently lost her youngest to tragedy so it’s the last thing I wanted after that, in consideration of her & our family’s loss. I agree there should be optimism & celebration in ordinary circumstances.

  5. May 25, 2015 / 7:42 am

    I had an afternoon tea to celebrate with some girl friends before my first was born, but I requested no presents as I knew my friends would buy things for the baby after she arrived! A few friends still brought gifts – including a gorgeous teddy head snuggly thing that is still my daughter’s favourite thing in the world 3.5 years later!

  6. May 25, 2015 / 8:04 am

    Those photos are beautiful Eva! I’ve loved organising baby shower’s for a few of my best friends. I agree that it’s such a lovely celebration!

  7. May 25, 2015 / 8:22 am

    I think baby showers are lovely. There are a time of hope, anticipation and joy (not just the presents and food) spent with loved ones. I agree with only one, however when someone has struggled to conceive or experienced heartache, why not celebrate again?! The present part is not necessary but most people get mum or bub something anyway. Making me a be clucky too.

  8. May 25, 2015 / 9:27 am

    I had a baby shower with my first, but totally agree that you should only have the one. Even though I had already given away or sold most of my baby things when I unexpectedly fell pregnant with my third daughter, I still didn’t consider having another baby shower, even though we were pretty much starting from scratch. By that stage you know what you do and don’t need, the things that worked and didn’t work, so it’s much easier to pull together what you need.

    • May 25, 2015 / 9:35 am

      Whoops … I accidentally clicked post before I had finished. I had meant to add that a celebration with family and friends before you give birth is a lovely idea … I know I tried to catch up with as many of my close friends as I could even just for a coffee and a chat before my last baby girl arrived. It’s such a lovely, exciting time to share.

  9. I have to agree wholeheartedly, Eva. I think it’s important to be optimistic during pregnancy also. Funnily enough, we actually have my sister’s baby shower this weekend and I know she is looking forward to having a chance to celebrate this special time with her closest friends and family. After 2 years of trying and a miscarriage, there is always that seed of doubt in the back of her mind, which is why it’s so important for her to have some positivity and celebration around this pregnancy, I know she needs it, she told me. And I agree with the being too exhausted to do it afterwards, I was in a total fog the first few months (ok 8 months!) after Punky was born, and while not as close to Christmas as you, it was only 3 weeks before and there is no way we would have gotten a baby celebration squashed in between all of the Christmas celebrations too.

  10. May 25, 2015 / 2:44 pm

    I didn’t have a baby shower with my first but my friends threw a surprise baby shower for me when I was pregnant with my second. It was low key, at my house. They all brought some food and chipped in for a couple of presents and we played some games. My eldest who was 3 at the time was included in all the games too so she was very happy! She thought it was a party for her because she was becoming a big sister! It was nice as once you have kids you don’t get to see your friends as often and pregnancy can be a very emotional and exhausting time. It’s nice to be made to feel special!

  11. May 25, 2015 / 5:36 pm

    I may not be a mum myself but I love going and celebrating all lifes larger with my friends, baby showers are one of those things that I don’t think you should give up.

  12. May 25, 2015 / 8:05 pm

    I think its a case of each mother to her own. Some enjoy the attention, others might not. The success of the baby shower also depends a lot on the kind of people who are throwing it. If they are not efficient enough or even care enough about the mother-to-be, the event will become a lack lustre exercise.

    You look radiant in that dress! 🙂 Stalking other posts to see who was in that bump 🙂

  13. May 25, 2015 / 10:30 pm

    I loved my baby shower too. I couldn’t wait for it and felt it was a big milestone.

  14. May 25, 2015 / 10:32 pm

    I had a baby shower and I’m glad I did. After waiting 4 yrs to get pregnant I most definitely wanted to celebrate!

  15. May 25, 2015 / 10:44 pm

    It’s been 15 yrs since Ash was born and honestly I can’t remember if I did… So j guess that’s means I didn’t huh

  16. May 26, 2015 / 8:26 pm

    I had one and it was a really special day. I think, why not? Why not celebrate the chapter a woman is about to embark on. It’s about as big as it gets. The presents are always wonderfully helpful too. I went to one on Sunday actually and loved it just as much being a guest as being the lady of honor. I do however agree, only one per lady. It would be a bit indulgent to have one every single pregnancy.

  17. May 29, 2015 / 9:18 pm

    Baby showers aren’t really my cup of tea. I totally understand where you’re coming from and why you enjoyed yours though! I think a new baby is to be celebrated but I’d rather (and did!) throw a welcome to the world party once the baby is born. Also, I think there’s a cultural element to it and whilst they are carried out more regularly now, it’s not a very British thing to do.