Increasing happiness through less overcommitment
Have you ever fallen into the trap of over committing yourself time and time again only to find that you’re always exhausted and wondering why you can’t seem to get everything done?
I have. I fall into this trap on a regular basis.
As a Mum and someone that works for myself, I find that I tend to over commit myself for a number of different reasons.
I organise play dates and coffee meet ups on all my days off to make sure Elliott and I are getting out and socialising, I often tend to try and squeeze various things into one day, we rarely have whole days at home.
Because I work for myself as a freelance writer, I also worry that every spare bit of time that I’m not spending writing or applying for writing jobs means that I may miss out. It’s a fine line.
The problem with overcommitting like this is that although my intentions are good, it’s really taking its toll on my happiness meter. I’ve come a long way in trying to embrace the mess when life gets busy, but looking beyond the mess, overcommitment is hindering my ability to take things slowly, to fit things in, to relax and to just be.
Overcommitment has hindered my ability to be truly present with Elliott without other things racing on my mind. Overcommitment has lead to dinner not being ready in time for us to enjoy together at the dinner table like it should be and it’s lead to my poor food choices when I eat in a hurry.
Elliott being sick of all things was what it took for me to realise that I need to slow down. Instead of going to our usual Playgroup morning on Thursday, our day was a quiet one at home. It was the first time in ages that I felt like I actually accomplished things. I vacuumed, I tidied, I baked a cake, I baked muffins, submitted an online grocery order, built toy train tracks, played with cars and had dinner on the table in time. I felt so organised, refreshed and in the moment and thought ‘I need to do this more often!’ I went from feeling pretty meh. to HAPPY!
It was on this day that I realised the benefits of just staying at home every now and then and I realised that it was OK for there to be days when we just didn’t do anything and that work related stuff wouldn’t disappear if it was left for a day.
So, the moral of my story today, whether you have free days during the week or the weekends are your only free time, try not to overcommit yourself, learn to say no and remember this phrase – ‘Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.’
Are you a sucker for overcommitment?