Kissing Kids On The Lips: My Thoughts

kissing kids on the lips

Kissing kids on the lips. Is it OK?

I joined the parenting panel on 612ABC Brisbane Radio yesterday and one of the topics we spoke about was kissing kids on the lips and if it was OK.  You can listen to the show here.

The day before going on radio, I was told this was one of the topics we would be discussing and I was directed to this article which was published on Kidspot.

I automatically thought to myself ‘ah, this is going to be a debate about passing on germs when you kiss your kids on the lips’. But, it wasn’t really about that at all, what the debate was really about shocked me.

In the article by Kidspot, they referred to another article which suggested that kissing your children on the lips could be considered sexual and “confusing” or “stimulating”. If a child sees their Mummy and Daddy kissing and then Mummy or Daddy kiss the child, they’ll get confused.  What the?

I never EVER considered this as a problem.

Yes, I am a lip kisser (only of my own child). I like to give Elliott a peck on the lips every now and then as a sign of love, just like I do with Mr. G. Elliott often comes and gives me a kiss on the lips too, it’s his way of saying “I love you Mummy” and it’s the most precious thing in the world.

There’s a big difference between kissing as a sign of love, kissing to say hello or goodbye and sexual kissing and I would never kiss Mr. G in a ‘sexual’ way in front of Elliott.

Gosh, I still kiss my parents on the lips when I see them and I’m 32. We have done it all our lives and it never ever confused me because I was raised to know the difference and boundaries.

So if this person who wrote the article suggests that kissing on the lips is a no no, what then about stroking our children on the back or holding hands?  These can be used in different contexts too. Where on earth do you draw the line?

Personally, I think it all comes down to what you teach your children about the act of showing affection so they know when it’s right and when it’s not. It’s pretty simple.

 

What are your thoughts on this topic? Are you a lip kisser?

 

Today I’m linking up with The Lounge on Musings of the Misguided

 

Eva Lewis (The Multitasking Woman)

Eva is the Editor and Owner of The Multitasking Woman - a lifestyle and parenting blog.She always has her fingers in many different pies but wouldn't have it any other way. Eva is a Mum to her 4-year-old son, 2 month old daughter, two chickens, one dog and a fish called Bob and a wife to Mr G. They all live happily in their little cottage on the outskirts of Brisbane.

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11 Comments

  1. October 30, 2014 / 12:47 pm

    I’m in the lip kissing camp for sure. I kiss them on the cheeks more often, or the foreheads, as my kids tend not to close their mouths haha. The thing is,there is nothing sexual about it at all. Any kind of touch can be sexual, in a different context. If you look at things that way, cuddling must be out of bounds too?
    I still kiss my mum on the lips too.
    Dani @ sand has no home

  2. October 30, 2014 / 3:46 pm

    Ughh I completely agree with you! If it is just a normal display of affection in your household then there’s no way a child will think it is anything other than that. Some people really do want to create a controversy out of nothing.

  3. October 30, 2014 / 10:41 pm

    Congrats too on the radio exposure. You are powering through with your multitasking mummy brand.! It annoys me that this subject has even been written about and discussed. Some families are lip kissers some may not be. I follow my boys lead if they want to kiss me on the lips I will kiss them back with motherly love. A well written and argued post Eva. !

  4. Alex
    October 30, 2014 / 11:00 pm

    Sexual!!!

    Get f*cked!!!

    Great article, congrats on the radio slot. I wrote about kissing my kids on the lips after someone called me a weirdo and said it wasn’t right. It’s just another example of adults placing adult connotation on something innocent. You know, someone once said to me I shouldn’t kiss me son on the lips because, and I quote, “I might make him gay” WHAT. THE. ACTUAL F*CK?!

    Sorry, great post. This stuff gets me riled. I came over from The Lounge after writing a Halloween post but maybe you’d get a kick out of the kissing one? LOVE your work!

    http://dadrites.com/kiss-kids-lips/

  5. October 31, 2014 / 10:26 am

    I’m a lip kisser! Kids just… do that often and my toddler would be most offended if I didn’t let him kiss me on the lips! lol!

    I totally understand that some people don’t want to. I remember when Lior first kissed me in the lips I felt a little weird about it, but then I lightened up! Now it is just a normal thing! I wouldn’t expect people to judge me for kissing my kiddies on the lips just like I don’t judge them if they don’t.

  6. October 31, 2014 / 10:35 am

    I wasn’t comfortable with it when my kids were small – it wasn’t something I initiated, but if they offered me a kiss on the lips I never said no!

  7. October 31, 2014 / 12:18 pm

    How stupid I would never consider that either! Kids are smarter than that person gives them credit for.

  8. TeganMC
    October 31, 2014 / 2:40 pm

    I’m a lip kisser with Mr 5. There is nothing cuter than his little lips puckered up ready for a goodnight kiss. Some nights I forget and he quickly reminds me that little boys need kisshugs before they go to sleep. I agree with you that sexual kisses are completely different.

  9. October 31, 2014 / 8:16 pm

    What a crock of shit! I kiss the girls on the lips and I think the person who thinks it could be sexually confusing has some major issues to deal with!

  10. Robyna_theMummyandtheMinx
    November 2, 2014 / 8:01 pm

    I remember when my little guy was about 3, I kissed him on the cheek and he said “Proper Kiss mummy!” grabbed my face with both his little hands and pulled me in for a smack on the lips. It’s an expression of love, pure simple and beautiful. We don’t need to make into something it clearly is not.

  11. November 5, 2014 / 5:28 pm

    People have way too much time on their hands. Way, way, way too much time. I kiss my kids on the lips. I think a greater concern is forcing children to accept or give kisses to people when they don’t want to.