Mess & Unannounced Guests

mess & unannounced guests
For such a long time I couldn’t stand people turning up to my house unannounced or with very little notice. It would put me into a state of inner panic. ‘How dare they just show up?’ I remember asking myself, stressfully.

I remember instantaneously stressing about the state of my house. ‘What will they think about the dirty dishes strewn across the sink? Will they look at the floor and see that it hasn’t been vacuumed?’

Let’s just say that not so long ago this topped my list as my number one pet hate. It was like I was trying to put on some sort of facade, like I was trying to appear as though I had it all together, trying to be perfect, trying to be SUPERWOMAN.

Fast forward to this week and I’m happy to say that now, well, I really don’t give a shit.

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On Monday, my next door neighbour popped over to let me know she’d just seen a snake in her backyard and wanted to alert me because of our chooks.Β Although I’ve only just started to get to know my neighbour, I don’t really know her at all. We were chatting away on the front verandah until I happily and without hesitation, invited her into our house. Elliott’s toys were everywhere, there were numerous baskets overflowing with washing, a dining table covered in crap and a bench full of dirty dishes. For the first time in ages, I didn’t care. After she had left, I gave myself a pat on the back, it was so damn refreshing.

clean house sign of wasted life

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When I come to think of it, it’s quite likely that it made my neighbour feel somewhat normal too. I suspect that with a little toddler who is only just starting to walk, she too is unlikely to have a spotless house (I’ve haven’t been over there yet but a playdate with the kids is on the horizon).

I think that as the almost 35 months have floated by of me being a mum, I’ve slowly been able to ‘embrace the mess‘, to accept that mess is normal, to realise that people don’t judge and even if they do say something to themselves in thought, that’s what it is, a personal thought and something that doesn’t have to affect me.

Mess is inevitable, it’s there sometimes and not all the time. When it is there, I’ve finally learned to accept it and to not worry about what others think of it.

It’s so worth not having to deal with the stress. And who knows, if I had been the old me and refused to invite my neighbour in, well, we may not have connected, had the conversation we did or arranged coffee and a play date!

I also wouldn’t mind if Ryan turned up and offered to clean my house though….

 

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How do you feel about people turning up unannounced when your house is less than presentable?
 

Eva Lewis (The Multitasking Woman)

Eva is the Editor and Owner of The Multitasking Woman - a lifestyle and parenting blog.She always has her fingers in many different pies but wouldn't have it any other way. Eva is a Mum to her 4-year-old son, 2 month old daughter, two chickens, one dog and a fish called Bob and a wife to Mr G. They all live happily in their little cottage on the outskirts of Brisbane.

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10 Comments

  1. Lisa Berriman
    October 23, 2014 / 6:16 am

    I’m not yet full able to deal with it. Although with some people I don’t mind as much. I just much prefer it when my house it clean. My mind is clearer when there isn’t so much mess.

    • October 23, 2014 / 2:36 pm

      Don’t get me wrong, I love a clean house too but sometimes it’s just not doable all the time and it’s those times that I’ve been caught out. Now, I don’t really care.

  2. Monique Olijve
    October 23, 2014 / 7:11 am

    Absolutely…I feel same…used to be like that too but I since learned that a warm welcome in an open messy house makes a lot more guests comfortable then the perfect clean castle πŸ˜‰ I still like my house clean and tidy but that’s in a perfect world and if people were really going to judge me for the cleanliness of our house…well that would be pretty superficial and I’m better off without people like that πŸ˜‰

    • Monique Olijve
      October 23, 2014 / 7:40 am

      Haha responding to my own post..is that weird? Strong words..wooh..very convincing..okay I’ll put them on my own mirror …so I’ll learn better to strive for imperfection πŸ˜‰

      • October 23, 2014 / 2:38 pm

        Nope, not weird at all! Wouldn’t the world be boring if we were all perfect!

    • October 23, 2014 / 2:38 pm

      Of course you like your house clean and tidy, it feels so good when it is but it’s also about being realistic and realistically with kids, it’s not always going to be clean. You will be glad to know that I will NEVER judge the cleanliness of your house, just how good you are at making coffee. πŸ˜‰

  3. October 23, 2014 / 8:11 pm

    I never worry about it. I always want people to pop over unannounced. I love it!! Heck they might even offer to do your dishes….Thats why pine-o clean wipes were invented!!

  4. October 23, 2014 / 10:37 pm

    This is me! Oh your words bring me great comfort Eva, I do need to let a bit go. I know I’m my own worst enemy. Thanks for making me feel normal πŸ™‚

  5. Emma Fahy Davis
    October 26, 2014 / 2:00 pm

    It stresses me out when people arrive unannounced and the house is a mess, but not enough to do anything about it!

  6. Alicia-OneMotherHen
    November 29, 2014 / 8:56 pm

    The state of the house doesn’t bother me anymore either, if they don’t like it they don’t have to come back! I do like to go to bed at night though with the house at least straightened up a little, it’s nice to wake up to it a bit tidy. Never stays that way though. I even swept the house while my youngest was crafting at the table yesterday. Any one would have thought I was mad, but I had the opportunity and I went with it, besides she was only messing up around the table.