Trust your mama instincts

Mother Instincts


Today Toni from Finding Myself Young shares her guest post with some valuable advice on trusting your motherly instincts. I know there have been many times in Elliott’s life where I am so glad I trusted my Mummy instincts, they are so powerful.  

Through her blog, Toni’s shares her journey through motherhood, love, relationships, family, happiness, life and its challenges, parenting and special moments with her gorgeous little daughter (pictured below, I love this photo!)



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As a first time mum its easy to get confused and overwhelmed by all the advice that gets thrown in your direction. Its nice that people care enough to share advice, but often it can be conflicting, which does nothing more than make you second guess yourself. Then theres the people who think they know so much more than you and outright tell you what you should be doing instead of making suggestions. On the one hand yes they technically may know more about mothering than you because they’ve been doing it longer, but that doesn’t mean what they know is right for you. Here’s the thing they may have mothered longer than you, but they weren’t mothering your baby.
You are the only mum your baby has. You spent nine months (or thereabouts) nurturing your baby while they grew inside you.You are the only one that spends hour after hour taking care of your precious babe. Others may come and help, but at the end of the day when they’ve gone home you’re the one up at night looking after your little one.  You are the one that knows your baby best, even if at times it doesn’t feel that way. Trust your instincts.
Being thrust into motherhood and having to take care of a helpless baby is daunting. Suddenly you’re responsible for a whole other person which you’ve never had to do before. Theres so much to learn, theres a little person to get to know and countless sleepless nights to navigate. But if you listen closely deep inside you’ll realise you have those wonderful mama instincts. Babies don’t come with a manual, but when they come out they do switch on those instincts. So when you’re in doubt look inside and see what your mama instincts are telling you. Trust your instincts.
When my bub was born she was happy and content for about two weeks, after that it all changed. She would scream for hours. She wouldn’t burp. She went from sleeping in between feeds to refusing to sleep sometimes all day. She would projectile vomit continuously (sometimes up to 16 times) after breastfeeding. She started getting a rash on her face that spread to her neck then her chest then her belly. I knew something wasn’t right. My instincts told me it wasn’t normal even when others assured me it was.
I got so much advice from friends and other mums. The problem was most of it was conflicting. Use wind drops, no don’t just hold her upright for half an hour. Babywear her to sleep, no leave her by herself to cry herself to sleep. Keep breastfeeding, no put her on formula. I was so desperate to make my baby feel better I pretty much tried everything. I used wind drops, held her upright, did bicycle legs, kept her close, changed my diet, supplement fed with formula on occasions, amongst a list of other things. There was slight improvement but I still knew in my heart that something wasn’t right.
I took her to doctors on countless occasions and it felt like they kept brushing me off as an overreacting first time mum. They explained away her symptoms without ever looking any deeper to see if something was wrong. Vomiting after feeding is normal, she doesn’t have reflux. Shes crying because she has gas, colic isn’t real. Her rash is just milk spots, its normal. Her rash its spreading, its probably just heat rash. She hasn’t got back to her birth weight, but she is gaining so we’re not worried. Time after time I was brushed off, but I didn’t give up. I knew something wasn’t right. Even though I’d never had a baby before, my instincts were screaming at me that something else was going on.
Finally, after persisting for weeks, a paediatrician at a hospital agreed with me that these weren’t normal reactions for a baby to be having. It was suggested that she could have a cows milk protein allergy and she was reacting to my milk. We went onto allergy formula and she started improving straight away until one day she choked and stopped breathing after a feed. After a hospital stay it was determined she was definitely allergic to cows milk protein and was put on a specialised prescription formula. After that she was a new baby. No more vomiting, no more choking after bottles, no more rash and no more screaming. She now has regular paediatrician and dietician appointments and has a strict diet, but shes much happier.
I knew there was something wrong from the beginning and I was right. I’m so glad I trusted my instincts and persevered until we got the help we needed. I can’t imagine where we’d be now if I hadn’t. Trust your mama instincts ladies, they’re there for a reason.
Toni xx

Eva Lewis (The Multitasking Woman)

Eva is the Editor and Owner of The Multitasking Woman - a lifestyle and parenting blog.She always has her fingers in many different pies but wouldn't have it any other way. Eva is a Mum to her 4-year-old son, 2 month old daughter, two chickens, one dog and a fish called Bob and a wife to Mr G. They all live happily in their little cottage on the outskirts of Brisbane.

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16 Comments

  1. Belinda R
    July 9, 2014 / 8:24 pm

    The $100 for so sensational cakes because I’m a twin and I had a baby last year on my birthday (which I already share). I’d love to win this so I don’t have to make a cake for either of us

  2. Belinda R
    July 9, 2014 / 8:26 pm

    My fb name is Belinda Moxey

  3. Kylie Bowers Weinz
    July 10, 2014 / 10:36 am

    I would love to win the Jack and Jills Toothpast set, with little ones around I would love to try a organic and safe product on them!

  4. Kell Kelly
    July 10, 2014 / 11:23 am

    The Arbonne or Quick Fix prize would be my pick,
    It might help get these wrinkles gone quick.
    Fine lines making me look past my prime,
    I’m sure I’m committing some beauty crime.
    Bub crying yes to skin that’s smooth,
    Dry itchy patches that would be soothed.

  5. July 10, 2014 / 2:29 pm

    You are right Toni. Although it can be hard at first to know how to read your instincts (I found it hard), when you know, you just know. I had a similar situation with Elliott, he was always getting sick. I was told ‘oh, it’s normal for kids to be sick 10 times a year’ or ‘oh, if he’s in daycare, that’s normal’. I knew it wasn’t normal and he was always getting chest infections and was admitted to hospital too. His speech development wasn’t coming along either. In the end it was his ears. He had mild hearing loss due to glue ear and infections and ended up needing his adenoids out and grommets in. His health has been 100% better since having this done last October. I think one of my advice for new mums is to definitely go with your instinct and that everyones experience is totally unique.

  6. Fiona
    July 10, 2014 / 4:13 pm

    Some fibre lashes and eye-colour would make me a happy mother. On date night I could surprise, hubby as I bat my eyes. A new look and a new me and one confused, but happy hubby!

  7. Peter Herbener
    July 10, 2014 / 7:18 pm

    I would be glad to win anything

  8. July 10, 2014 / 7:33 pm

    What a fabulous range of prizes you have, Brilliant. Congratulations on two years! such a great feeling to meet that milestone huh 🙂 enjoy the celebrations and thanks for linking up for Sunday Brunch great to see you xx

  9. Laura Scriven
    July 10, 2014 / 9:44 pm

    DIY Facials and So Sensational Beauty for me,
    But the financial plan will set us free!
    My man needs all the help he can get,
    His plan is set-and-forget!
    And his birthday is almost here,
    Maybe a Sensational Cake for cheer!

  10. Tamara Lamb
    July 10, 2014 / 11:00 pm

    So hard to decide but I would love to try the Dirty Works range! 😀

  11. July 11, 2014 / 1:32 am

    Jack n’ Jill Hippo Gift Pack

    love that the toothbrush is biodegradable and recyclable

  12. Kirsten W
    July 11, 2014 / 7:07 pm

    Moment on the lips, forever on the hips,

    Not with Dirty Works Body Butter.

    The one for me, coconut’s the key,

    Sets my heart aflutter!

  13. Alisia Cameron
    July 11, 2014 / 7:17 pm

    The Arbonne packs… pretty, pretty please!!! I have many
    reasons why (like that bub and I have sensitive skin), but really I just
    want enough beauty products to be able to say: “I told you I would be
    ready in 5 minutes, stop calling me every half hour!”

  14. Mandy D
    July 11, 2014 / 9:00 pm

    Brand new shoes would be a wonderful treat;

    For some very deserving little feet;

    Her current shoes are lacking proper support;

    For a well-known brand, the quality fell short;

    Now I’m looking for a shoe that won’t quit;

    Clarks shoes from Cloggs sound like the perfect fit!