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Comparison is the Thief of Joy

comparison is the thief of joy pin

While doing as I usually do, flicking through Facebook, I came across a post From Tara at Baby Guru Nutrition that pretty much stopped me in my tracks.

The heading was “Comparison is the Thief of Joy.”

I would be lying if I said I didn’t compare myself to others while scrolling through Facebook. Of course I do, most of us do. And what irks me a little, and what Tara is trying to point out in her post, is that some posts on social media are simply not a reflection of reality. The perfect baby bedrooms, the post-baby body workouts and designer baby fashion. Mums with beautiful makeup that look flawless while going to cafes with a clean toddler in tow, perfect kitchens and no-mess lounge rooms.

More to those people who can uphold that type of lifestyle, there’s nothing wrong with them, but for many, it simply isn’t achievable or even worth the effort trying to achieve.

If you think about it, it’s so easy for everyone to share what Tara calls ‘the highlight reel’ of their life. We’ve probably all done it before. You can easily take a photo of your kitchen that perfectly blocks out the mess sitting on the bench,  you can take a photograph of yourself and your usually messy toddler right before you visit the café at which you and your child come home looking a little dishevelled. You can use fancy filters and editors to make your skin look more flawless.

Comparison IS the thief of joy, it sucks the joy right out of you and although it’s human nature,  it’s energy destroying.

Yes, I have unfollowed social media accounts where I found every single post just too ‘perfect’. The account started off as inspiring but then, well, it just wasn’t. It wasn’t a realistic picture of how I live my life and so the inspiration quickly wore off.  There’s nothing wrong with unfollowing an account that makes you feel this way, it’s nothing personal, it’s just all about you and making yourself feel a bit better.  Why have to deal with stress, anxiety or lack of confidence when you could simply unfollow.

I can say that whenever I post photos of myself or my home, I do not strive to perfect it. It is what it is. There are many photographs where I am not wearing makeup because, well, that’s just me and I’m not trying to paint any other picture.

Here, take a look at my kitchen. – piles of paper, empty milk cartons, cups, plates…a family lives here.

keeping it real messy kitchen

Take a look at my office – a pigsty but that’s how I work best. .

Keeping it real messy office

This is what I look like today – messy hair, no makeup and unplucked eyebrows.

Eva The Multitasking Woman


No editing, no cropping, no filters, it’s real. I always try to keep it real.

So why not keep it real for yourself. Filter what you see and hopefully,  it will bring back some of the joy in your life. #keepitreal

Eva Lewis


  1. February 11, 2016 / 12:12 pm

    I gave up comparing a long time ago, at least out loud to people. If I’m honest, I still mentally do it. But my kitchen is way worse than yours.

    thanks for linking up #thisparentinglife

  2. February 12, 2016 / 10:15 am

    My life is so far removed from being picture perfect. I’m not sure people really want to see the ugly of good, bad and ugly but they are never going to see something that isn’t real from me, especially on social media. It’s too exhausting trying to be something you’re not.

  3. February 12, 2016 / 11:45 am

    Yep, that statement is the truest ever. It is a thief. Keeping it real here since 1976. xx

  4. February 12, 2016 / 7:07 pm

    Loving the unfiltered Eva. And I’m loving the site too (not sure how long you’ve had the redesign, and the broader brand too – remember chatting at Problogger. Hope you are feeling well and enjoying Elliot and pregnancy. X

  5. February 12, 2016 / 8:20 pm

    I have to admit that with instagram I do try and make photos a little bit more perfect… because that seems to be the status quo for IG. But I do try and keep my posts as honest and real as possible to counteract the pretty pictures. I try not to compare myself but I inevitably do it all day long {hence the feeling I need to make my photos look prettier}. However I never wear makeup and I don’t really care who sees me without it, because I’ve kind of forgotten that I ever did wear it. So I guess in a way I am quite comfortable being who I am.

  6. February 14, 2016 / 10:40 am

    Great post Eva and, by the way, I love, love, love your splashback! Cute kitchen and cute selfie too. Thanks for keeping it real.

  7. February 15, 2016 / 7:43 am

    Eva, I love that that kitchen wall feature! Where can I find it?
    I follow mostly large families on social media so I am used to the mess. My home is a disaster zone but my kitchen is usually quite tidy because I am over-the-top in there about cleanliness. I am clean-obsessed but six kids constantly undermine that!
    I have no problem with either presentation – over-styled or messy when it comes to other social accounts. It’s horses for courses.

  8. February 16, 2016 / 4:18 pm

    A very true statement and one I’ve been heeding for a while. It’s always possible to find people who are more than or less than you, but what does that achieve. Do their lives affect me in any way? No! So I mind my own business and go about my merry way. Great post.

    • February 16, 2016 / 4:27 pm

      It’s certainly not easy to ‘not’ compare but very easy to just mind your own business and move on. 🙂